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Our Relationship With Ourselves


A lot of attention is given to our relationship with others – our significant other, children, other family members, friends, co-workers or the guy at the oil change place. Cultivating and maintaining those relationships is important, however…


When was the last time (if ever) you spent time cultivating your relationship with yourself?


Did you just cringe, grimace or give me an eye roll? Our relationship with ourselves should be just as important, if not more so, than all those other relationships. As writer and photographer Susannah Conway puts it “your relationship with yourself is the foundation of everything.”


If this is true then why do we not place more importance on our relationship with ourselves?Living with ourselves in a healthy, positive space goes back to the idea of living your intention. It’s about setting an intention to be loving and compassionate with ourselves. Relationships aren’t easy and certainly the relationship with ourselves is no different. Having a positive relationship with ourselves is important to our own growth, happiness and well-being. Living vibrantly comes from the inside out and radiates to those around us.


With any other relationship we value, we make the effort, we sacrifice and we are understanding. We must do these same things with ourselves.


A part of a balanced, happy and healthy living lifestyle is being on good terms with ourselves. Listen, this is the body, mind and spirit we were given. We are stuck with it so, basically, get over yourself and start getting in sync with yourself.

It took me a long time to make peace with myself and stop doing the self-loathing-self manipulating-self-sabotage-self blame game. It’s exhausting and, honestly, I got tired of doing it day in and day out.


Once I stopped spending so much time loathing myself and actually looked at myself inside and out, I realized that I wasn’t so bad.


There were areas and things I wanted to improve to be my best self. Okay, no worries, improvement is good. But after a long time of letting go of the negative self talk I started to really see “me”… and actually I kinda liked that person. Not there yet? I hear you. It’s a process of letting go. The self-loathing and negative talk is so much easier than sitting down and getting to know yourself and accepting yourself (ugh), right? Wrong!


I came across a blog post that Rachel Rabbit White (yes, you read that right) wrote that talks about cultivating a positive relationship with ourselves. Remember, it takes time and patience just like when we are cultivating any other relationship. Check out Rachel’s post here: Being in a Relationship… With Yourself.

Does this resonate with you? Did you find any tips and tricks to improve your relationship with you?


One thing I want to mention is that if you find your relationship is in a destructive state or if you are concerned, you should contact a professional to walk you through the process. Sound scary? No worries, we are supporting you and encouraging you!


Wherever you are on your journey with deepening your relationship with yourself, know it takes time, a little (or a lot) of humor and patience. I think you’ll be surprised at the gifts you’ll receive when you do.


Until we meet again, Live Vibrantly, my Friends!

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